Between Two Worlds

The wild life calls to Andy.

The wild life calls to Andy.

Amos and Andy take a nap.

Amos and Andy take a nap.

I sit and hold Andy in my arms as if he were a tiny baby. I started holding him this way when he was about four weeks old, except that he fit in my hand at the time. I have always called him my kitty baby. There is nothing on earth as touching as a tiny, frightened kitten who finally allows himself to be coaxed into your hand, then offers a huge sigh of contentment upon having his belly rubbed. This is an animal that has given a human his trust, completely and without reservation.

My Andy grew into a fine cat who still loves to lie in my arms the way a human baby would lay.  Andy holds his head back so I can easily access the soft, downy fur under his chin. As I gently massage Andy, I look at him intently. He appears to be just as content as he was when I finally convinced him to let me be his surrogate mama. I am holding back tears that will flow after he leaves me.

Andy has always had the freedom to roam the land. He will sleep with me until 3:00 a.m. every morning, then ask to go out so he can be with his feline friends and do the sort of things cats do at night. When his brother died, Andy looked for him for so long that I feared he would never get past the hurt and loneliness. Finally, one morning, Andy did not stop at the door and wait for his brother to enter the house first.

Andy has found a female friend with which he has made a family. I know, cats don’t usually find a mate and stay with her and their kittens. Andy is different. He strongly leans toward the DNA that was written for his ancestors, where the Lion king stays with his pride. He is a good daddy, a strong protector.

Right now, Andy is between two worlds. When he leaves me, he starts to yearn for the touch of my human hand on his head as I stroke him. Yet, when he is with me, he feels a strong pull to go back to his family. In the beginning, he would stay with me for several days, then return to his pride. Now, he comes for a quick meal and an hour in my arms. Then, Andy returns to the wild for a week or more.

I can tell that my Andy is torn between two worlds. He loves his mama, but he needs his independence. Just as human boys grow up and leave mama, Andy is trying to make the break. I can’t tell him that it is okay or that cats are supposed to be wild. Nor can I tell him that I will always be here whenever he feels like visiting. I wish our communication was that sophisticated, but it isn’t. Andy will have to trust that I will always be here and that he is free to live his life as he chooses.

Andy feels as if he is deserting me, but he is only doing what comes natural for cats. As long as he is happy, I will not worry. I stroke his soft fur as he sleeps. Andy sighs. I can’t hold back the tears. I raised him as I would a child. Have I confused him terribly? I can only hope that I have done no harm. I raised him the only way I knew how, with perfect love.

13 thoughts on “Between Two Worlds

  1. If we could all be this caring, this world would have been a sweet place to live in 🙂 Please accept my nomination for the SWEET BLOGGING AWARD. Please visit my blog for details. Please keep loving and caring….. 🙂

  2. Such a beautiful and moving article. I have always found that sometimes animals make better friends than people. With a pet you receive one of the purest forms of loyalty, devotion & kindness.
    All the best for you and Andy!

    – HalfEatenMind

    • Thank you for visiting and taking time to comment. I agree. Animals forgive and will always give us another chance to get it right. The world would be a little sadder without them. Come again any time, my friend.

    • Thank you for reading my story about my kitty-baby. He visited me today and it was so sweet. He slept on my bed today, like old times. He wants so badly to hold on to both worlds. At least you and I will be ready to let go of this world when God calls us home to the other. God bless.

      • Yes, Today I was thinking about your story and finally found words. We go about doing our earth things so much and we must, but how comforting it is to come to our Father for His love, comfort, and wisdom. I am reminded to come “home” more often.

    • Animals love unconditionally. They teach us how to love without expecting anything in return. They trust us to not harm them, but to do only good. To think that God created animals because he knew we would need each other is truly beautiful.


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